Soliloquy in an International Cloister

Watch your step as Brother Lawrence takes you inside the monastery walls of a five hundred year-old international order. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll wish you had ignored your hormones and joined the monastery.

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Location: Rome, Italy

02 April 2006

The Chronicles of Friar Tuck

"Back in the cloister at last," sighed Brother Lawrence as the heavy wooden door leading from the monastery's orchard closed behind him with a thud. "I never thought I'd hear myself say that," he mused, while a bittersweet smile formed on his lips. He had always enjoyed traveling, and jumped at the chance to serve The Big Guy on the Lazy Jack Silver mission. Excitement had turned into anxiety, however, as he discovered the magnitude of the task he had been given. There had been too many risks, too much violence, too many ... compromises.

Closing his eyes, Brother Lawrence leaned back on the cool, stone wall of the monastery and let the cloister's viscous silence envelope him. How could people live like that? The Princess' constant soirees. The raucous, all-night parties of Princes Michael and Daniel. Heather's constant worries about one or the other Swiss bank account being discovered. He had newfound appreciation for the lifestyle of simplicity he had chosen. Yet, he had to admit that at times he felt a strong attraction to life outside the cloister walls. He loved the Princess' witty banter. Then there was Heather, who moved effortlessly between cold-crystal elegance and red-hot seductiveness. Her image was burned into Brother Lawrence's soul. How many hours of corporal mortification would it take to forget her? He wasn't even sure it was possible. One thing he did know, the discipline chains would be swinging tonight.

He opened his eyes and began moving toward his cell. Special Agent Waffle would want his report tomorrow. She could easily find the same information from other sources, but she would nonetheless insist on his personal report. She was very demanding in that respect. What would he tell her? Certainly, the mission had been an important one. LJS knew too much about the Vatican's plan to destroy all existing copies of Da Vinci's Last Supper and replace them with altered copies featuring Mary Magdalene with a beard and hair growing from her ears. But who had tipped off Norah and Bobble to the plot? And just who was Pog working for now? The questions swirled in his head until he became dizzy.

His musings were interrupted by the tolling of the Santa Anna, the largest of the monastery's five bells, calling the brothers to vespers. As he changed course and made his way slowly toward the choir, Brother Lawrence wondered whether the world had finally seen the last of Friar Tuck.


Anonymous heather said...

I'm trying to think of how to comment whilst maintaining a respectful silence. I'm not much good on silence...

Hello and welcome to blogland.

03 April, 2006 11:06  
Anonymous Pog said...

Oh there you are. Lawrence.

03 April, 2006 14:48  
Blogger Br. Lawrence said...

Effusive thanks to my first two visitors. Since both of you are experienced bloggers, I feel I can ask you this question. How do I get this blog to write regular, witty entries? It just seems to sit there waiting for me to do something.

04 April, 2006 16:10  
Anonymous heather said...

I thought regular was enough - no one ever said anything about witty as well. Nope.

04 April, 2006 20:10  
Anonymous bobble said...

I had to do penance for missing this.

13 April, 2006 23:55  

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