Soliloquy in an International Cloister

Watch your step as Brother Lawrence takes you inside the monastery walls of a five hundred year-old international order. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll wish you had ignored your hormones and joined the monastery.

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Location: Rome, Italy

18 May 2006

How do I look in ermine?

I am writing today from an undisclosed location so remote that the sun has trouble finding it, where I am attending a top secret meeting. I was sworn to secrecy, but I know that I can trust all of you to keep this secret because I met you on the Internet, and you all seem like nice people. Here, a small, but determined group of brothers is planning to re-establish the Holy Roman Empire. I can almost hear you say, "Finally!", and I could not agree with you more.

This, of course, is a huge undertaking that requires a lot of planning. We have been meeting for over three hours, but hope to finish before tea. Our timetable calls for a commencement date sometime after our summer holidays. You would think that this would be a rather straight-forward endeavor, but there are some disagreements. A few brothers feel that starting right off with the Holy Roman Empire is a bit too ambitious. They prefer to start with something smaller, say the Holy Arkansas Empire. Some think even this is too ambitious and are proposing the Well-Behaved Arkansas Empire. As you see, there are still some details to be ironed out. Even the simple matter of who will be the first Emperor is proving to be not without controversy. I am sure that it is a matter of time, however, before they acknowledge that I am the only logical choice. After all, I have chosen the coolest name: Eleutherius the First.

I will keep you posted.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Moobs said...

Wouldn't you have to be Eleutherius the second? Or are you going for Emperor rather than Pope

19 May, 2006 08:37  
Anonymous Pog said...

Can we call you Elly for short?

19 May, 2006 13:37  
Blogger Br. Lawrence said...

Definitely Emperor, at least for starters. And if there was already an Emperor Eleutherius, we shall change history by royal decree.

Pog, calling me Elly is punishable by death. As one of my faithful readers, you may address me as: Oh Great One.

19 May, 2006 17:14  

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